Puerto Rico- Day 5

Today, after a failed attempt at waking up and going to the coffee shop, we drove to Guaynabo to meet up with the kids prior to departing to old San Juan to evangelize. We were greeted with smiles and parcha flavored icees (did I ever mention I developed a strong bond with a tropical fruit?). One of the members of the church, was a college girl, Ashley, made every one of the missionaries a coqui frog (native frog) necklaces. After consuming these delectable parcha related items and putting our handprint on the wall in one of the trailers we painted, we got into the party bus (literally!!!) and departed for San Juan. We stopped at an outlook and admired the beautiful landscape God created and allowed us to see before embarking on such an important mission (within a mission). After witnessing this beautiful landscape, we drove the remainder of the way to Old San Juan. We were partnered up with one of the kids and given tons of magnets that said "Jesus loves me and I adore him" in Spanish as well as some other informational cards about Christianity in both English and Spanish! We evangelized with the kids!! After a long morning of walking in the hot Puerto Rican sun, we were greeted with the familiar chant of "tengo hambre, tengo hambre (I'm hungry in Spanish)!!!!", we headed to Vaca Brava for some phenomenal steak, chicken, ribs and pork (paid for by the church!! :0). After this fantastic lunch, we walked around the area still and then returned to one of the old forts in San Juan and flew kites with the kids. It was SO bittersweet when we had to say goodbye. I learned so so so much from all of these energetic, smiling children. The rest of the afternoon/evening we walked around San Juan and happened to walk the exact path as marked with "God loves you" magnets! How crazy! God shows himself in so many unique ways! We headed home (Salvation Army), had another wonderful dinner, and relaxed before/after our evening debrief and worship. This evening I finally got the courage to walk up and tell the random guy I had been thinking and praying about that God wanted me to write this letter about trials and tests and give it to him. He was so so appreciative and said it was something he really needed and I couldn't have smiled even bigger.

 

 

Javier will always remember me because I am the background on his vetch watch :-)

 

Awesome meal at Vaca Brava!

 

 

Will and I killed it while serving the meat at lunch!

 

Walking in Old San Juan

 

 

 

Panorama at the fort in Old San Juan

 

Perfect kite-flying weather

 

 

Cemetery that surrounded the fort

 

 

Carlos!

 

Amanda and the pastor

 

 

Group picture at a scenic overlook en route to Old San Juan

 

Andrea!

 

Gabriella

 

Ashley and the coqui necklaces

 

Handprints on the wall of the trailer we painted!

 

At the fort

 

Walking to lunch

 

 

Puerto Rico Day 4

After an early rise with little sleep (living with chronic pain, lemme tell ya), my mom, Will, Carter and I walked to the same coffee shop again and WOW I love the coffee here. When we walked back to the Salvation Army, we ate breakfast and ventured with the rest of our team to Guaynabo to continue out VBS! I wasn't acting as such a strong leader today, and I was excited about what God was going to show me through this opportunity for others to lead. In the morning, I helped create visual aids for the kids to understand the story of the resurrection and then helped paint the outside of their new trailers (picture 6). After a great lunch (provided by the church), I helped with the vbs and we were able to visit the daycare across the street and minister to them as well. Our kids even used their own visual aids that they made and explained it to the kids at the daycare. All afternoon I had been carrying a little girl, Amanda up on my shoulders and it was adorable (picture below). We finished up around 3pm, like always, and of course all of the kids ran and gave us phenomenal hugs. After driving back to the Salvation Army, Will, Carter, my mom and I rode the public bus to old San Juan and were going to visit a beach there. We were given some incorrect directions and ended up on a beach with an infinity pool surrounded by hot tubs, next to the inlet where wizards of waverly place was filmed (popular Disney show). Praying for some happiness and I was BLESSED with this. Wow, how amazing. At worship tonight, we had a quiet, sentimental, personal worship. During the first part of worship, I was outside in the lobby, talking with Robin (the big, whole group leader) about how some of the things she said when she opened out night up, they really struck home and allowed a lot more to connect and to make sense and we talked for a while. I got a message from God to write a letter to this random boy (other missionary) and I was so confused. I have never talked to him before so ???? Why ???
And I was fighting it for the longest time and when I walked back into the chapel, he was sitting in the back, by the door, crying and I started writing. Weird. I didn't have an opportune time to give him the letter of inspiration and hope the same day I had written it, but said a prayer for the next day. During our debrief of the night with our team, we learned that one of the boys (Joniel/Darnell/Donut) who has been coming to VBS all week, lives in a household with people that all are part of an African Tribal religion and this was his first splash of God and His love. Powerful. Our team meetings always allow me to see things from a different perspective and learn new ways to go at things. Something else I realized is that being a Christian is completely a full time job. You shouldn't only minister and evangelize when you're on a mission trip in a foreign land, but at home in the grocery store, sitting in a baseball game, literally always. God is always good, trust him and keep the faith. Until tomorrow.

 

Amanda!

 

Donut!!!!

 

Creating the visual aid for the story today!

Puerto Rico Day 3

An even brighter, early morning, my mom, Will, Emily and I made our way to a quaint coffee shop within walking distance from where we were staying. The Puerto Rican coffee is SO strong and it was outstanding. I loved it! Picture below is a native speaker I asked to proofread the story of Jesus' resurrection I was writing in Spanish for vbs the next day.  After walking back, we thought we would be so late, barely make it and everyone would've already eaten when we got back. But when we arrived back to the Salvation Army, the food hadn't all even been made yet. After eating and finishing getting ready (around 8 am) we made our way to Guaynabo for day 2 of the vbs. we started with the story/skit of Jesus dying on the cross. I read the Spanish version of the story for this. After a craft and lunch, I switched to help with painting one of the new trailers. One great thing about today was the fact that it had been consistently raining off and on and Puerto Rico was/still is in a drought. God was putting on my heart to go inside the sanctuary (weird, right?). This was a different building, but I went in there anyways and in the sanctuary was the pastor's son and his young son as well as our group leader and the entire project leader. The leader and I talked for about an hour and she said that God put it on her heart to tell me that I was so strong and she said she could see it. She had some personal adversity that she went through, and that helped build her to where she is today and it's just phenomenal how much we related. After returning from Guaynabo, my mom and I snuck off to the beach (again) for some alone time. About an hour after we had arrived, other members from out church group came, and we played beach volleyball and hung out in the warm, warm, warm water (picture below). it was relaxing and much needed. After eating a typical Puerto Rican dinner, we had our nightly meeting (during which, about 8 previous things connected together with something my mom and I found in our bibles, what kids said, our devotional and everything really). It was amazing how soooo many things connected at once and it was great to see God work right within us. After reflection, we headed to bed.

 

Coffee shop adventures!

 

 

 

Joniel, who we thought was named Darnell, and ended up calling Donut all week.

 

Puerto Rico Day 2

After waking up at a bright and early 6:45 am, we ate breakfast and headed to Guayanabo for our mission work. When we arrived, the kids were peeking out of the trailer windows to see us. We were given a tour of the church, prayed over, and split up (half would do construction/home improvement work, and the other half would help with a vacation bible school, which, only thank to us were they allowed to put on). During class today, we talked about the birth of Jesus and I helped translate/ tell the story in Spanish.The kids were so sweet and I connected with them SO well. I was allowed the ability to stay with the kids all day (skipping the construction work) thanks to my Spanish skills. The last hour of today, we went on a prayer walk. After each kid was paired with a teenager or an adult, we walked around, praying for things and inviting kids in the neighborhood to come to the vbs. it was so touching! We head back home around 3 pm. After we returned back to the Salvation Army, my mom and I snuck away to the beach (fully clothed as you can see in the picture below) but beautiful. After an amazing dinner (provided by the Salvation Army), we had a phenomenal, moving worship session and I reflected upon how not only we are changing the kids' lives, but they're changing ours just as much. God is so good.

 

Dana!

 

Teaching the kids songs in English. I helped translate.

Featured:

I am a C. I am a C-H. I am a C-H-R-I-S-T-I-A-N. And I have G-O-D in my H-E-A-R-T and I will L-O-V-E Him eternally!

 

Beach adventures!

My Mission Trip to Puerto Rico-Day 1

Day 1
After waking up at an excruciating 2:45 am, we met up at our church at 3:45 am to travel and prepare for our 5:45am flight. Flying from IND->ATL took a little over an hour and we had a very quick transition to our next flight. After arriving in San Juan, (my hair started frizzing up immediately), we boarded the Adventures in Missions vans and drove the short ten minute drive to the Salvation Army we stayed in. After lunch, we were allowed some free time. My mom and I roamed the opposite way of everyone else in downtown San Juan and met some very interesting people. As we walked down the street, we came across so many neat, little markets and bought some unique dried roots and fruits. A picture below is me holding my passionfruit drink (native to Puerto Rico), my dried yuka (starchy vegetable) and my parcha (type of citrus fruit). Another picture below is a small restaurant owner on calle tapia . He showed such abundant patience and gratitude for our patronage and business and we were so thankful! This entire time I rarely spoke any English (well, when I did, the residents didn't understand me). But, I got to practice my Spanish so much! And the best part, I was understood! On our way back from the shops, it started POURING rain (keep in mind, it never rains in Puerto Rico). After running/ shuffling/ hustling in the rain for ten minutes, we decided to seek shelter under a small cabana-like restaurant. Picture 3 is of a man that started up a great conversation with us and although he frequently switched between English and Spanish, it was such a pleasure meeting him. We got back to the Salvation Army and had dinner. I made lots of new friends (from Mississippi and North Carolina) and had so many great laughs before an evening church session and planning of the start to our entirely student-ran vbs we would be putting on in a church about 20 minutes away in Guayanabo. Until tomorrow!

Picture of the mission team from New Day Church!

Man that started up a conversation with us!

Patient, caring guy that helped us try new foods!

 

 My yuka chips, parcha and parcha juice!

coping

tears rush down my fair-skinned, freckle-kissed face

disbelief flows from my trembling body

what a caterpillar calls the end, others call a masterpiece

the analogy provides no solace

you aren't a bug 

& you've always been a masterpiece to me

coping is different for everyone

one part of me is scared, mortified, at the fact that I am grieving again, so soon 

the other part of me thirsts for the normalcy I had before this

my ill lungs take slow, controlled breaths

my supportive mother holds me until I have let it all out

my trustworthy puffs plus tissues support me through another heartbreak

and my heart continues to pump oxygen-rich blood into my body

so many times, I have caught myself saying I'm making no progress, and I never will

untrue

the little things

look at the little things 

the little things are what manifest into the big things

keep breathing

keep seeking support

keep letting it out

and keep living

(You got this!!!) 

building up my walls

I compare my life to a multiple wall building/ house

On my own I try and build up a wall, provide myself security and trust. 

And all of the sudden, someone enters my life. He/she starts helping me dig through the rubble in the basement on another side of the building, and start building my way back up on that side. It's a side of my building I didn't even realize I needed help with because my back was turned. Since my back was turned, I could've gone my whole life without knowing about that destruction and rubble. When people enter my lives and help me dig through the rubble, they help me create something I couldn't do on my own. When they leave my life (often abruptly), they take the biggest hammer they can find and smash that wall back down, to lower than before. Learning from our mistakes are rebuilding those faulty walls, with sturdy bricks and foundation, so that, as an individual, we will never allow someone to come near our building with the possibility of knocking down the wall. It's so sturdy and now that we have learned from it, it isn't coming down. No matter what. 

There's something in you that the world needs

Hope

Holding onto the hope that one day it will be different

Dreaming that one day I won't have to worry anymore

Clinging on to my hopes and ambitions because that's all I have left

16 Things I've Learned By 16

1. People won't always treat you like you treat them; be mad, frustrated, but don't you dare take it out on anyone.
2. Do whatever you can to make people happy. Go out of your way to walk that dog, bake that cake, or write that letter.
3. Smile. Always.
4. Don't settle. Know what you deserve and don't tolerate any less.
5. Crying is not a sign of weakness. Cry. Cry hard, cry long, and cry loud. Sometimes you need some tears to allow you to see the world a little clearer.
6. Accept all of the help you're offered. Don't be too stubborn.
7. Cut off the people who treat you less than the best. You don't owe them a response or any sympathy at all.
8. Cherish the small things: the little insiders, the stupid messes, and the corny jokes. The small things become the big things.
9. This is a quote by C. S. Lewis, "Hardships often prepare ordinary people for an extraordinary destiny." Tests and trials aren't meant for you to break down and lose hope, to push you up and beyond the issues, and strengthen yourself.
10. If you know something is wrong, speak up. Advocate, scream at the top of your lungs until you're heard,.
11. You will make mistakes. Don't dwell on them; don't ignore them. Accept them and learn from them.
12. Success won't be found overnight. It will entail more rejection than you ever thought possible and you'll consider giving up more times than you'll consider continuing. But don't ever give up.
13. Be slow to punish, but swift to reward.
14. Find your passion, determine your goals and ambitions, and don't stop until you get there.
15. The greatest triumph you will ever encounter isn't when you get knocked down, but your journey recovering and rising after the fall.
16. Things will never go as you hope or anticipate, and that is okay.

Wet paint

There is no point in trying to make some things better.

When you try to fix a messy, wet paint job, it almost always makes things worse. No matter how hard you try, or what else you layer on, it won't get better. The best thing you can do with that messed up paint job is to wait, let it dry, and come back and try to fix the problem at a later time. So often I am found trying to address my real life issues right the moment they happen, and sometimes this isn't the best case scenario. But, all in painting terms of course, if I mess up my painting and get a towel and wipe up the mess immediately, I don't end up having to wait the extended period of time to get my mess resolved. In my life, some things need the quick fix, and then they're all better. Other instances need to let the original coat of paint dry before I even make an attempt to clean it up. And then some, even more complex, need to also allow all of the other additional smears, wipes, attempt-to-fix-the-screwup coats dry as well. It's hard to fathom, but understandable, sometimes you have to drift apart before you can drift back together.

The Past Week (more interesting than it sounds i promise)

I haven't written in what seems like so long,
Actually it's been two days:)))
I write so often but I get so lazy to actually update my blog. LOL
Well in the past week, instead of being surrounded by the trashy hilljacks of Indy, I was surrounded by the slightly less trashy, Florida residents.
Monday March 30th:
best part- DISNEYYYYYY (and hot boys)
worst part- fifth wheeling for my cousin, aunt, and their boyfriends aaaand succumbing to getting a wheelchair with pain through the roof
Tuesday March 31st:
...
Brain fog
........
I don't remember
Wednesday April 1st: (Autocorrect) "did you mean, the worst day ever?"
For starters, I woke up at FoUR ThiRTY
:) ok
riding to the airport was E X C R U C I A T I N G (horrible choice to type out such a long word like that)
The day prior, my grandpa and I had tested out to see how the suitcases would fit in the car, ensuring that I could comfortably sit without heightened pain and actually it fit well, good to go.
so after waking up at F O U R T H I R T Y, PLOT TWISSSTT, and the suitcases now fit differently, SERIOUSLY HEIGHTENING MY PAIN
and my grandpa's response was
..
..
"tough"
OH
K
   A
      Y
*anger emojis*
(>_<)

ヽ༼ ಠ益ಠ ༽ﾉ
So, by the time we arrived at the airport at about 6 am, I was already bawling and losing my mind, all my six in the morning.

I also have something on my boarding pass so I don't have to take off my shoes when going through security and THIS LADY OH DON'T GET ME STARTED
she had the nerve to start going off on me about how I needed to take off my shoes because I wasn't in the correct line for what was on my ticket, I started to tell her about my medical condition and she felt the need to announce to every single being in the security line," I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR MEDICAL CONDITIONS OR WHATEVER ELSE YOU GOT GOIN ON, YOU NEED TO TAKE YOUR SHOES OFF AND FOLLOW PROCEDURE."
:)
:)
:)
hold
:)
me
:)
back
:):):)

I don't really need to give many other details but basically that is how the entire day went so THERE'S THAT:)
Thursday I got my hair cut (thank goodness) poor hair was suffering so much
And my hairdresser told me that the last person that cut my hair didn't cut it evenly :)))))))))
Thursday, lightning struck our house and we lost the functioning of two tvs, xbox, wii u, refridgerator and wifi.
God c'mon man what did I do to piss you off so much omg
Friday I went to lunch with Jessie* (name changed)
If you have never heard me mention her, here is the background story:
Speech began this semester as any other new class would, ice breakers to get to know our classmates, awkward hellos and a synopsis of what our speech class will coni=sist of, yadda yadda, boring boring
There was a quiet girl that had sat next to me for multiple days and one day I was just like "hey!!!!"and she looked at me like "( ͡ಠ ʖ̯ ͡ಠ)"
But over the course of these ten weeks, Jessie has really opened up to me and trusted me with some serious secrets. She has told me that she doesn't have many friends and I have been the only one keeping her going. (aw moment!!)
Anyways, lunch with her on Friday :)
Friday and Saturday both I wet to work, wanted to cry when I lifeguarded, but smiled sooo much during my swim lessons IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY
KIDS R GR8
And now, I am sitting and reminiscing about the glorious past two weeks without school and slowly but surely entering the beginning stages a mental breakdown because school starts back up tomorrow :)))))))
All for now, what are some topics I should write about? I love suggestions!
Also, SUCH exciting news. Last time I checked how many views my blog had and it had only 11, today it had 264!!!!!!!!
*screams so everyone can hear*

Unique adjectves S)

I am a bit of a word fanatic and when I come across new, interesting words, I love to share them! I mean, what's the point of using words that no one understands? Here are some extraordinary words to spruce up even the best writing!
salient- prominent or conspicuous
sardonic- characterized by bitter or scornful derision; mocking; cynical; sneering
soignee (French soigne)- carefully or elegantly done, operated, or designed
sordid- morally ignoble or base, vile
sprightly- animated, vivacious, lively
svelte- slender, especially in figure
supercilious- haughtily disdainful or contemptuous, as a person or a facial expression

These are just some of my favorite and the neatest words I have come across! More to come, let me know what you think!

"What in your life is calling you? When all the noise is silenced, the meetings adjourned, the lists laid aside, and the wild iris blooms by itself in the dark forest, what still pulls on your soul? In the silence between your heartbeats hides a summons, do you hear it? Name it, if you must, or leave it forever nameless, but why pretend it is not there?"
This quote from the Terma Collective reminds me that my mission in life isn't one that I should give up on. If I can't go a day without thinking about it, it is obviously meant to be in my life. With or without chronic pain, I am determined to fulfill this mission of mine, and to the best of my ability.

New Legislation In Indiana

I love the fact that so many people are commenting on the two bills recently passed without even reading the bills or obviously obtaining any substantial knowledge on the subject.
First of all, the "religious freedom bill" is actually a combination of two bills that can be viewed here and here. Please just go read them immediately.
Did you see any mention of homosexuality?
Yeah, me neither! These bills are literally stating nothing new; they are restating our first amendment.
Governor Mike Pence said, " This bill isn't about discrimination, and if I thought it legalized discrimination I would have vetoed it."
40% of U.S. States have a bill similar to Indiana, as does the federal government. Why isn't there a big uproar in regards to those states? These bill are literally not saying anything new, AT ALL! It is the reiteration of a 1993 NATIONAL bill passed by Bill Clinton.
This law didn't address a particular problem, but it created problems not anticipated (rightfully, because these homosexuality issues have NOTHING to do with the bill).
Robert Katz of Indiana University stated, "The bill says that the government cannot impose any law that substantially burdens a person's religious exercise without some sort of compelling government interest." This is almost directly quoting from one of the bills, by the way. :)
One of the opposing arguments is the fact that this new law can exempt businesses from every single Indiana law. This isn't the case and there are already protections in place to protect individuals from this happening.
The only issue concerning LBGT residents is the fact that because the same sex marriage law was just recently passed, there aren't these protections in place to protect them specifically.
Dear all ignorant people,
Actually Mike Pence just wrote on a piece of paper, "hey businesses just say you don't wanna serve gay couples lol". I would so appreciate people actually forming EDUCATED opinions instead of making up what they THINK is correct.
Actually READ the bills, and then form your own opinion.
Sincerely,
Everyone who has taken time to determine what the bills are really about!!!!

Anxiety and the fact that "everyone has it"

I think physicians should conjuncture a new term or two that separates the anxiety that I get and the anxiety that (most of) my classmates receive.
When someone says, "oh wow I am so anxious" and I see them sitting still and able to calmly talk about something else, I consistently will doubt the seriousness of their claims.
Anxiety for me includes (but isn't limited to) violent shaking, everywhere, and all of the time, eyes darting, heart screaming, furious sweating, oh and this is all while taking a test in English.
There is a fine line between my above described symptoms and someone who is nervous for a test next period.
Anxiety can often be similar to your [females] menstrual period. Ghastly comparison I know, but just when you think you're in the clear for a while, your anxiety comes screaming back, full fledged or potentially worse than before.
My anxiety is me drowning in a pool, struggling to get air, so close, but not close enough, with everyone else around me swimming and diving down right next to me. The ironic thing is when he/she dives down next to me, I can't quite grab onto them on the way up, but he/she comes up for air with ease, and I am stuck wondering how to get above the water, even just for a quick breath.
Anxiety and anxiety are not the same and I wish people would recognize this.

Just realized you could title your posts :)

A day in warm weather is never a day wasted,
although a typical day consists of me throwing up more than I consume,
I would rather be throwing up in warm weather than cold :)

Screaming and crying with no end in sight

Wishing and praying for a resolution

This arduous battle, one big plight

And with all these sufferers, there is no magic solution

Depressive thoughts linger and hide,

No longer finding joy in the little things

There isn’t a treatment I wouldn’t try,

Fingers crossed for what the future brings

You don’t understand the true definition

Of putting on a bright and cheery smile,

When my entire life ambition,

Is to be happy, just for a while.

Everyone here is on his/her own quest

Just like a book and its cover, we hide things best.

Strangely enough, I have never formally created a blog before.
My natural perception of blogs were that blogs were written by individuals drinking coffee in their cali beach home writing their shortsighted and trivial points of view with no substantial knowledge of the real world.
After reading many blogs, I have absolutely realized that this is often the case (bet I got you with that one! haha).
Unlike these dreadlock laden, over caffeinated hippies, there were some blogs written with significant thoughts that in fact did influence and inspire others.
The point of this first blog post is not to illustrate my despise towards ignorant blog writers, but to show that blogs and the information in them can and do make a difference and starting this blog signifies my readiness to FINALLY share my story, all of it.


****
(no offense to any dread wearing, coffee drinking, Californian that comes across my blog)